Last batch before the mid semester begins

Anzac weekend

I've clearly been having way too much fun the past 2 days by spending some quality time in the suburbs.
I decided to take the trouble to travel all the way to Clayton two days in a row to visit some friends and hang out for a bit. It was pretty much 11am - 7pm on both days but still fun despite having to wait painfully for the buses to arrive (I had to change buses a few times and they took about 20 mins to arrive a few times with the added horrible driving skills to make up for it) ...?

We spent some time shopping at Chaddie on sat after i dropped off these stuff at Clayton for the M2 gang

Blondies(this was a hit btw)

Italian cheesecake (had mixed reaction to this)

before joining Michelle and Chengsu in their mini shopping trip to Chaddie. May Jin came along too :) I have this odd habit of bringing desserts everytime I pay them a visit. We shopped for a bit and I ended up buying two pairs of flats which cost me $70. Not proud of that ....

On sunday itself, we traveled to Glen Waverley for brunch which was obviously
before heading to Clayton to see Michelle's place and stayed around for a bit at her place and also another friend's place before leaving for the city. Plus we met another classmate on the way back to the bus stop. Exchanged numbers and hopefully arrange a gathering soon!

That pretty much sums up my weekend with the additional unplanned invitation to join some friends in their trip to Gold Coast which I might eventually turn down since I know I can't afford it. Money doesn't exactly grow on trees nor do they actually fall off the sky.

I would rather let my dad or brother have that sum of money than to use it for my own benefit. Being labeled as the mummy of the class is obviously not something they randomly came up with judging from how i react to certain situations. I do admit that I have that side to me but that is what u would expect from someone like me.
Given a situation where I would have to buy a really nice shirt and having to decide between a t-shirt for myself or t-shirt for my dad/ bro, my prominent decision would be the t-shirt for my dad/bro. That's what I've been accustomed to do.

But I will proudly tell the world about the bond me and my ding-dong brother share. It's one that u wouldn't come across really often.
From what I learnt from my friends, they are indeed close to their siblings but there is always that fine line that separates certain aspect or issue that is out of their comfort zone. It's that kind of bond u share with your parents mixed with some sisterly/ brotherly love. U are staring straight at someone who does the following:

• teaches her bro add maths, mod maths and at times chemistry(it's pretty much everything at times) . If not, i'll be holding a sejarah book. At most, holding a paintbrush when he was in form 3 and doing his artwork for him until 2 am when i have to work the next day.
• my brother's personal fashion consultant. I decide what he wears and the fashion statement he makes. I always have a say in whatever he buys. Most of the time, even if he thinks it's really nice but yet i think otherwise, 90% of the time he won't get it in the end. If i think something looks nice on him but yet he thinks it's not worth the effort, 80% of the time I am right and he'll get it eventually and wear it SUPER often because it does look good on him.
  
• I am the only one he is comfortable with when it relates to sensitive areas of his body. Let me put that down in greater detail to avoid any misinterpretation. He once had an infection on his upper back thigh and required special medical care. I had to be the one to apply the medicine and everyone else were off limits.
• We do sleep on the same bed occasionally and it's perfectly normal. Though I really hate it because that dude can't stay still at all.
• I know 90% of his secrets and mind u again, I even help him do facial treatment once in a while. So no hush hush in between.
  
• Whenever I am back, he spends about 1 -2 hours in my room every night just lazing around on my bed whenever he is bored just to annoy me. And most of the time, he'll end up sleeping on bed and I won't have the heart to wake him up.
• At one point, I was so disappointed in him and we both cried together the whole night ( me from the disappointment and he from the guilt)
• I have my way with him. He gets really worked up whenever I am pissed off with him and frantically tries to tone down my anger.
  
• I am also his part time cook btw. My job is mainly the preparation of late night supper. My bro refuse to cook supper for himself as he finds it too tedious and he'll automatically barge into my room to announce that he is hungry and ask me to cook for him. Sister Sim here will then proceed to the kitchen.
• How do u all actually wake ur siblings up? Is it by sitting on them? Well... that's my method of doing things and trust me when i say it works.

He turns to me for advice on anything from relationship to hairstyle to what he should wear for an outing to random nonsense. So the closeness stems from my authoritativeness mixed with a hint of sibling relationship.

The end....

URGH!!!! I hate myself ! Should NEVER lose sight of what's important!
Damn it la !

Watch me repent !

rainy days

I actually do enjoy rainy days in KL contrary to the ones in Melbourne.
Even though we might have to stay in or perhaps miss out on my weekly exercise but i usually don't have much to say whenever it rains.

Rainy days in KL means everyone is mostly probably at home --> or even if we're out, means we'll be busy sheltering each other . I remember the last time I was out in Kiara hill for some exercise, it started pouring cats and dogs and I had to run back to the car to grab an umbrella to shelter my dad. I did fall sick the next few days though. haha. Even when I was working at the end of my first year, it used to rain heavily every once in a while after work and usually in that situation, the grumbling from my dad is a definite thing but yet he'll take the trouble to make one big round to the sheltered area to pick me up. <3 Well for melb's case..... it literally means strong winds and cold front with the added drench that we can't possibly miss out on. Somehow or rather, whenever it rains really heavily in KL, I'll most probably be sitting in the living room with my dad if i am at home. We won't be doing anything specific but the company is there. U know I can't say the same for Melb right? :) Please stop raining soon so that I can go out to get the ingredients to make my cheesecake?! Cheesecake reminds me of my HOME! Beloved relatives who sang me praises for the cheesecake I made specially for them during cny that they insist I make one for each family instead of the usual one slice per person. Mind you, I have about 5 - 6 families to take care of.

What is the real reason why I always bake for my friends?
Is it because I enjoy doing so and also because it makes them happy?

U might wanna think again....

however, I do bake for my family because I enjoy making yummy stuff for them.

But that doesn't apply to the other.

The real motive shall be left unknown.

Hail the fat pig that fell from the sky

I am referring to myself as pointed out in the title ... hahaha.

A tad bit overdone but that's how i feel at the moment.
After injuring my left foot and I am long overdue on my school work, I hardly have the time to move around freely and also exercise.

The foot is well on its' way to recovery but that doesn't mean I can jump with joy and rush out with my sports shoes and resume all activities. No NO NO! I prefer to take things slow. Say give it a week or two to completely recover and start off by taking a slow walk perhaps?

Mid sem exams are in about 2 weeks time and guess what???? I started studying for it already ! I wanted to occupy myself for a bit and decided to spend the last few evenings at the library doing some catching up until 8 or 9pm before heading home. Helped a lot in keeping myself busy for a bit but not too well on the wellbeing side. Well that is until today.

I reached home only to find hsmate cooking up a storm. It was just pasta but she made it from scratch which is impressive and it tasted good. Guess it's been a while since I last came back only to find my meal all prepared on table and waiting for me. As expected, the whole situation did perk me up quite a bit! Not hinting anything in particular but just pin pointing out what has been bothering me the last few days.

yup it's definitely homesick alright plus some painful memories! XD

It's like an inner tug of war and trust me when i say it's not an enjoyable experience all together.

Hint: 母

Not something I find joy in bringing up but nevertheless, it can't be avoided. At times, i choose to recall the past so that I won't forget but then again it will indirectly induce unnecessary sorrow and plenty of WHAT IF?

Not my best moment

It's a like a perfect scene where I am taking a slow walk through life and a wall just had to fall right down in the middle of my walkway.

basically up to me to face that wall and overcome my worst fears and climb over that wall to continue on with my journey.

Best part is that whenever I come across that wall, I have no one else to relate to on that matter without drawing too much attention to myself. It's my ego and pride that refuse to budge and since young, I've been taught not to rely too much on any individual as it might result in over-dependence. I don't expect anyone to understand and the last thing i need is pity. It's indeed a one woman show.

There will never ever be more than one human in that battlefield. At least not until I permit the trespassing and spill every single detail that has been haunting me for close to 10 years now.

I do not speak of this matter in public as it brings back way too many memories and hurt that can be pain staking and unbearable at times. I wish it will all dissipate into thin air and leave no trace whatsoever and save me from all the misery.

Despise the fact that I am one individual blessed with unlimited amount of tears. Ok maybe not since I recalled crying until I couldn't cry anymore (happened in 2008) !

Therefore, to avoid all the unwanted events from replaying in my mind as if it's on repeat mode, i've been spending a fair bit of time at the library trying to get my head around my syllabus. Home just became the worst place to hang out.

I need major distractions to keep myself occupied but of course only the good distractions are welcomed :) Library is my new hangout spot and coffee + sleep became my best friends. I should probably stop myself from consuming 2 cups of coffee a day. As bad as it may seem, I can't seem to get through the day without at least one cup. Sorry for being over dramatic, I need to straighten my life out before it's too late.

I think today was the only day I actually laughed that much in 2 hours. All thanks to my new found favourite teacher. He actually encouraged a student to say shit while trying to teach her how to pronounce a Chinese syllable properly. Well... he did try sheep initially but that didn't help so he tried the other word and it worked! LOL.

Robot

Do u know how it feels like to be a robot?

Having a meal right at this moment with some of my closest friends in KL would be a God given gift

Just the normal girly chats over dessert or hysterical giggles and laughter over something silly or even reminisce about the good old days.
(Sorry bestie, I just had to upload that pic! hahaha.)
(ugly pic of mine but the latest one of me and penguin - i just tarnished my own image)

Apparently I don't get that kind of joy often here nowadays.

But I am also more than happy to settle with a family reunion dinner

with my noisy little cousins squabbling away or the voices of the adults deep in discussion
(pumpkin face cousin) haha!

To date: 7 and a half months more to go.

My first tiramisu

More pictures can be found on my facebook and recipe can be found on my food blog :)

Kim's trip and the pothole

Slowly spiraling out of control ...

Like they say "It hits the hardest when we're down". I thought I've left it all behind a few years ago but apparently that was what I thought so. However, it kept coming back every once in a while and again just ytd. I'm seriously not any different compared to the rest ever since I assumed the role 9 years ago. "If u can't change it then learn to live with it." Judging from my circumstances, turning back the clock is not even an option let alone having the slightest hope that everything could return to how it was before.

But I badly needed this moment to remind myself how far I've come to reach this stage to regain control over my life. My more hardworking self just recently started falling deeper and harder into that "LAZY" pothole I dug out myself due to the massive amount workload that refuse to stop piling over one another. It's only a matter of time before they seal off the top with me buried underneath.

It was only a rough 2 weeks and more to come in the near future so buck up lazy bum and stop allowing the unwanted to flow freely every night.

Anyway, here are some of the pictures taken when Kim came down from Canberra. Damn! I miss some of the girls so badly.

The cake was too sweet but i finished it anyway! haha.
Let's kick my split personality one side and back to my happy, bubbly, talkative self! :) I love being able to do that! haha.

Additions to my baking posts

Lemon Pound Cake

Tuna puffs

Blueberry butter cake

Tiramisu or Ricotta cheesecake during the weekend :)

I know I've been wanting to try out tiramisu forwhat felt like ten years but I never had the chance to due to the overwhelming cost of the ingredients. Just a bottle of liqueur will easily cost me $30 and I am not willing to spend that much money on a cake and yet give half of it away at the end of day.
However, things finally took a turn and I have one bottle of Baileys Irish Cream sitting in my kitchen right at this moment thanks to a friend of mine. He bought it as a gift for our housewarming session XD and I accidentally blurted out to roomie some nonsensical stuff about what I almost did. hahaha.

I really think that those around me are spoiling me to bits. Starting from my parents to my housemates to SOME of my friends (unfortunately this does not apply to all my friends) and then housemates" family. Susahlah like that! Don't blame me if I get too spoilt for good and end up whining my head off in future when things are not the way I want them to be.

Whenever I express my dissatisfaction on a certain matter, 70% of the time they can be regarded as a joke or just a mere statement that has no significant underlying meaning to it. However, the excess 30% are the ones that shouldn't be taken lightly. Those issues are the ones that will be embedded in my memory and not one that can be easily thrown away or forgiven. Most of the time it will affect my perception of that person (refer to the red highlighted point above). But I am one who will give the person a second chance to redeem themselves. Don't worry, I don't change my perception of others just because of one incident but I can't say the same for the same offense twice. Clearly, I am still upset with some of my friends here but it's not one to bring up in my blog. Just because i have a slightly more hectic lifestyle back home, it doesn't mean that I want to be thrown one side and be excluded from any activities.

The ones in the following picture are still the best when it comes to preserving my emotional well being. "Mereka paling pandai jaga hati saya". The following picture was taken last night during dinner. We (referring to us girls plus roomie's relatives) had dinner at a nice little Italian restaurant after attending roomie's award ceremony. Congrats again miss Yilee for obtaining the highest score in one of her subject ! (you're not the only one feeling the stress *phew*)
Talk about stress man ! haha. Btw, I love that picture below because we're all dressed pretty much alike and looked happy and awesome (yes! I was pretty much referring to myself but both of them were smiling too!)

I should really count my blessings. Things are finally changing for the better. What goes around DO in fact comes around ! XD So remember to always give more and take little ! :)
and I used to think that people will eventually suck the life out of me since I always put others above myself which sucks btw.

housewarming

From the pile of mess before to this spread! Me and yilee had our very own housewarming session on fri. Sadly, majority that turned up were my friends and only 2 of miss loke's friend could only make it. Nevertheless, we had a great time. With good food comes good atmosphere ! :) Glad everyone got along pretty well !

THE FOOD!

THE PEOPLE !

Yup... that's me alright! I do that pretty often nowadays!

awesome group photo!

Can u spot me?

Own food blog

yeap, u heard it right... I just created my very own food blog where I will post up pictures of my baking.

It's not that I won't post any here but it'll be limited to one or two pictures only.

XD

The blog is anonymous so u would have to ask me personally for the link :)

Easter break

The much needed break is finally here. Apart from spending the past few days at home, nevertheless, it was indeed enjoyable. Spent a whole chunk of my time *points above* , watched some movies that I totally missed out on due to my busy lifestyle and of course SLEEP!

The next few days will be pretty darn pack with my schedule all filled up from thurs - sat.
Thurs - group discussion and dinner with girl friend from Canberra *giggles in delight*
Fri - Grocery shopping and preparation for Sat plus dinner with a friend
Sat - Housewarming

8 months to date

Frustrated, upset, disappointed are only some of the words that can be used to describe my feelings at the moment... Failing one twice or thrice is fine ... But four times in 3 months? This is just way too much for me to handle...

I did not fail a test or exam btw but suck big time when it comes to baking.

is it that hard to master the skill? Grrrr.... Annoyed...


Don't be deceived by the pictures below... it may look pretty and all but the taste is horrible.


By that, I mean the sponge cake. All other stuff are alright but just the sponge cake. I failed miserably for four times trying to master the technique but yet the outcome remains the same. The chewy rubbery texture that refuse to budge. The taste is fine but it's the texture thats' got me so worked up.

Yilee!!! I need your HELP !!! Just spare 1 hour of your precious time to teach me PLZ !!! I'll make u newyork cheesecake in return.

And did I mention I really dislike the fact that all of my close friends are in KL and I am the only one stuck in Aus? I really need those chit chat sessions that can go on for hours and their ears for all my miscellaneous and never ending ranting of mine. I think they are the only ones that can ever put up with me. They understand me well enough to say the exact words I need to hear.